My first STD was from a foam party
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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