That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
