Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
We have started to decorate penises.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
