after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
