Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
