we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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