Walk of Shame. In a state park.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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