There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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