do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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