She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
