i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
