her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Randomize
