I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
