Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize