jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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