his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
