pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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