Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
jump out the window naked night went bad
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