heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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