I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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