So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
