so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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