I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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