Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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