Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
you made out with another girl for some wings
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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