batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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