Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
