Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
