Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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