quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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