There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
