Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
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