You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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