Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
