So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
