New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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