Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
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