i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
