Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
