May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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