I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
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