Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
