You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
