But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
