moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
