Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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