I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
