I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
