is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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