I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
