Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize